Every time the boy steps down this path, the more I am impressed with his will. Outside of pain play, he's already submitted to many things that were my thresholds and I don't see the drive backing down. Or my careful doling of commands, orders, and most recently, punishments have been systematic to the boy not being worn out by them. This latest one is definitely going to be a challenge to those boundaries which I have yet to find.
Speaking of boundaries...I feel that the boy, like me, will be difficult to punish. Even more so because I see there is a sharp line between punishment and pulling the handbrake. Things like sticking him in the corner, which I did this last weekend, yield a quiet and subdued boy -punishment it was not. Still, it makes it nice that I can send him there without much effort on my part and get a pleasing result. We had a discussion born from the fact that he hurt his shoulder fairly bad which would incapacitate him in certain situations. I told him to tell me what I could do for him to ensure his comfort because, I'm not ready to make him uncomfortable yet. He told me to not be afraid to let him fail. I am afraid that he has a misunderstanding of self imposed failure, setting up for failure/ as well as pain and hurt. I have absolutely no problem wrecking his body full of pain. He's yet to wince in my little steps towards spanking, pinching and raking or digging my nails into him and that will be remedied. Since I am not the one that gave that bruise, I don't know how bad it hurts. So, rather than try and guess, which I'm only willing to do within the parameters I set up, I would rather care for his shoulder. He was instructed to stop doing what he was doing should any of our activities cause him to wince, I told him I would punish him if he disobeyed that and it would have been one that red lined him. I've learned in my own experience that taking away a person's vices truly tests how far they are willing to go. But, I think both of our efforts made that a non-issue.
Now, I can finally reveal his homework that I gave to him this weekend. The boy likes to fold paper into shapes. The first couple of times I saw him do it, I knew that level of focus so when we started this, I knew this would become a part as the D/s stuff began.
I want to test his ability to produce a long term focus, on his own time, with very little guidance of my own. Again, this being for the purpose of finding what sticks, what doesn't and what can be used for punishment.
So, the rules on this venture are to find real name of the "obedience" flower as I found a relatively simple origami pattern to make it. I then told him he must find the pattern for it and reproduce it in 7 days. I decided to employ as well, a fail safe for him where the web address of the pattern is written on the inside of the flower, because I will not set him up to fail. However, in coming up with this task, I noted how easy it was for me to find it, how to get lost finding it, and the only hiccup that I've come across is his obsession with detail where the origami flower and the real flower are different in the number of petals. I reminded him that there can be several interpretations and to quit focusing on that one aspect. And I can't help but think now how insubordinate that is, him pointing out that fact. But, he allowed himself to get off task, I gave him the meaning of the flower and that is enough to find the name and find the pattern. If he succeeds and does not need to look at the web address, he earns the chance to refuse a punishment and the next time we play, I will finally indulge him in some pain play. If he has to destroy the flower in order to find the web address so he can make it, he only gets the pain play. If on the seventh day, he does not have my reproduction, he must make me an origami that displays the same level of creativity, ingenuity and effort that mine did. Luckily for me, if it comes to that, I get to be the judge if his effort met mine. He told me that this sort of thing would play on his perfectionism, which is not necessarily a good thing. I had to remind him that he's not suppose to like punishments.
Off to continue work on the next project....
-afina
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