Again, I have the issue of not knowing where to begin, because I've been purposely keep things away that I've wanted to share for this moment. Now they're all garbled up (and I'm trying to get something down so it's out of my head when I go in today for my possible promotion!). Where to begin, where to begin.
This was the weekend that, originally, was suppose to be one of the options for when I collared Oz.... it seems almost like a lifetime ago. So much has happened in that short little month. Admittedly, I'm glad that we didn't wait because the collar has served it's purpose of a reminder, a talisman, and an empowerment to everything going on that could have likely made moving forward more difficult- not impossible, but definitely not as easy as it has been. Every time I need a reminder that this is something that Oz wants, being able to know that his collar is on reminds me that everything is still in place and my own self doubt shouldn't exist in those moments.
With everything that was coming up, I wanted to do a little experiment with Oz. For awhile now, I've had him do the origami flowers which have seemed to be a good little tool here and there. I told him that I wanted him to tell me five reasons why he thinks I like him folding paper. The reason that I wanted to do this was to see exactly how he views me in the instructions I give him. The reasons themselves weren't all that important- in their own right, yes, but more so to how in tune with me and my signals he is. I am projecting myself to be in what I suggest to him to do. I wrote down my own reasons and essentially, for 3 of those 5, we were dead on (and in the same order as well)....kind of creepy. Focus, Beauty, Submission. I will take those, however.
Oz was instructed to tell me- his punishment for not doing so was going to be no bacon on things. That boy and his bacon. Afterwards, as things do, they never go to plan. I had originally intended for the four of us to have some fun on equal terms (rather, that was what was agreed upon) and then afterwards, we would ramp up the pain play. What we didn't do was take into account that this was three in the morning? Damn socialites, heh, Oz and Omnia are both just so fun to talk to, they make the time just zip by.
So, we ended up taking a nap, which actually ended up as sleeping... Omnia had to run home for a moment and we had a nice little moment were Oz thought GM was Omnia- heh, at least no dick in the back. But breakfast was had, more play happened and I had already long before come to the conclusion that our play will have to wait for a next time. Yes, I was the tiniest bit irked- mostly at GM because he was passing out after Omnia drained him dry. (hehe, she's awesome at her skills) But cest la vie. The important thing was that we were all having a blast.
After messing around after breakfast (I think....it's a bit fuzzy), something stirred in me, and I'm not quite sure if it was a physical response or initiation between Oz and I but again with my sleepy Dom that rests quietly until she seems a moment, she perked up and looked at his creamy unmarked skin and said, "I'd very much like to put a mark there.....and there...and don't you think a welt with that brand new cane you bought would look lovely there?" I couldn't agree more with her. I made sure to check with Omnia that she was cool with us playing and I grabbed one of my knee high socks and covered up Oz's eyes. I had originally bought a blindfold that would have done fuck all but blindfold so I had to improvise.
Once his eyes were shut, I grabbed the device that GM made for me- a three pronged back scratcher with a long handle- I wanted this so that I could reach wherever no matter where I was standing or sitting and began to scratch his back, lightly. I wanted to tingle and wake up his skin before moving forward. After awhile, I grabbed the cane and began to give him smacks all along his ass producing those thin welts that I desired to see there. He began to wince, it seemed after the fourth hit- I knew I was becoming more comfortable with caning him harder. There were a few times that I accidentally hit him in the same spot, and it wasn't intentional. I know from my own experience that it hurts when that happens. After this, I stopped and grabbed old faithful: the flogger and while I sat on his legs with him face down (the position he was in while I caned him) and began to methodically pop him along his ass and back. Every well executed blow landed would produce a small forest of trees from the frayed ends of the falls. This is making me realize more and more that I do have a sadistic side. Everytime I landed a good blow, I wanted to do another one.After this for a few moments, I decided to bind Oz's hands together with a French Bowline and brought him up to his feet. Here my memory gets a little funny on the sequence and to prevent this blog from running too long- I flogged him, used my brand new crop, fed him a slice of orange and the most interesting this was dripping water down his back. It produced a very cool tingling sensation as it evaporated on his back that was echoed when I used a small canvas painting brush to run up and down his chest. Yes, that will definitely be remembered.
I'll admit, after I landed the first blow with the cane, I was terrified. Omnia was in the room with us from the very beginning- GM had gone out to smoke. I knew that what I was doing was okay, but unlike the instances of being topped and bottomed that she witnessed before being done to Oz, this was the first time she got to see me do it. I didn't feel a sense of pressure to perform, but I knew with every motion I made, I had a little fear of, "Once I do something, I can't undo it." Left overs from feeling more responsible than I should for other people's emotions and mental state. (which is different from the aspects where that applies in a D/s relationship) But I believe this is a one time deal. Omnia had a great big smile on her face once I finished and it made me feel so good. On that as well, the need for aftercare that I had was minimal. I was mostly concerned with the state of welts, scratches and Oz's hands turning purple from being bound up with them above his head. I'd never forgive myself if I harmed those delicate fingers and the beautiful flowers they make me.
Oz, I grow bolder each time, I appreciate your zen like mannerisms as I learn myself. You really are a good boy. xo
-afina
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